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Hakoda

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Hakodachillin
Hakoda
Biographical information
Nationality

Drunk Water Tribe dude

Age

Meh

Physical description
Gender

Male

Hair color

Brown and some shit

Eye color

Blue like the ocean

Personal Information
Allies

Just beer, I think. Oh, and Sokka

Enemies

Everyone

Weapon of choice

Beer bottle

Fighting Style(s)

Drunk

Chronological and political information
Profession

Guy who enjoys getting drunk

Position

Pretends to be the chief of the Southern Water Tribe

Affiliation

The bar


"Uh... anyone seen my beer?"
―Hakoda

Chief Hakoda is the self-proclaimed chief of the Southern Water Tribe. A drunk, sexual predator, murderer, and borderline insane lunatic, Hakoda is a pretty fucked up person. To make matters even funnier, this guy was able to get together with a female and produce two kids. Luckily his two kids, Katara and Sokka did not turn out as fucked up as their father (ok, maybe Sokka did) and they went on to save the world from the Fire Nation during their teenage years. Too bad Hakoda was too drunk to be able to appreciate their hard work though. Talented in nothing whatsoever, Hakoda just spent his days drinking and trying to pleasure himself. When his children were young, Hakoda left them alone in the Southern Water Tribe to buy some beer to fight in the war against the Fire Nation.

HistoryEdit

Early LifeEdit

Hakoda was born in the Southern Water Tribe to his mom Kanna some time ago. Hakoda's journey to becoming a mentally unstable person in adulthood began in middle school when a few kids dared Hakoda to drink some beer. Tired of getting beaten up by the other kids, he accepted the dare and drank the beer... and he liked it. Alot. Soon afterward, Hakoda became obsessed with getting his hands on any beer that he could find. After screwing up horribly in high school due to his drinking obsession, the only college that would accept Hakoda was Southern Water Tribe Community College. Unsurprisingly, he ended up screwing up again in college and was kicked out after a week. With no college willing to take him, Hakoda moved back into his parent's igloo and started spending his days just getting drunk. At some point, Hakoda met Kya and after sending love letters to her, stalking her, beating her, and threatening to kill her, she agreed to married him. After they got married, Hakoda continued to beat her, abuse her, threaten to kill her... oh, and sexually molest her. Atleast he remembered to use a condom though.

Before the ShowEdit

Hakoda: "Sorry kids, your mother was killed earlier today... by, uh... some Fire Nation soldiers, yeah, Fire Nation"
Fire Nation Soldier: "Dude, we didn't kill her!"
Hakoda: "SHUTUP!"
— Hakoda telling Sokka and Katara about their mother's death

The years flew by and Hakoda and Kya still remained together since Kya could not leave him due to the fact that he would hunt her down and kill her. Eventually, Kya gave birth to Sokka since Hakoda knocked her up by accident while he was drunk. When she revealed the news to Hakoda that she was pregnant, he proceeded to beat her and cut her with a broken beer bottle. A year later, Kya once again got pregnant and you don't even want to know just how pissed Hakoda got that time. At first, Hakoda was angry over having to deal with two kids in the igloo now, but they Katara eventually grew on him. He was rather fond of watching Katara... uh, a little too fond. As for Sokka, Hakoda really had no interest or useful purpose for him. Just as long as Sokka didn't touch his beer, everything was alright.

Several years after the birth of his children, Hakoda's wife finally lost it with her husband's abusive behavior and hid away Hakoda's beer so he could finally quit his drinking addiction. The next day, Kya was "killed by in a Fire Nation raid".

Heading OffEdit

"Being a man is knowing where you're needed the most, and for you right now that's here protecting your sister. Now don't try to rape your sister... I have plans to do that when I get back."
―Hakoda before leaving for some beer

Before he knew it, all the beer in the Southern Water Tribe was gone due to Hakoda's excessive drinking (living in a barren icy wasteland does have its disadvantages). Considering beer was the only meaning in his life, Hakoda started to seriously freak out. Before he lost all his sanity, Hakoda quickly rounded up all the men in his tribe so they help him on his journey to Earth Kingdom for beer. All the men at first declined since... well, who in God's name would want to go on trip with this insane fucker, but they changed their minds when Hakoda promised that their would be pussy for them up in the Earth Kingdom. He told his kids some fake story about how he was going to fight in the War and that he would be back in like two weeks or something. That turned out to be some serious BS though and for the next two years, Hakoda partied all around the Earth Kingdom.

Just when he thought that he would never have to worry about his kids anymore, Hakoda accidentally invited Sokka to his nudist party he was holding at Chameleon Bay. While Sokka was extremely excited to see his dad again (for some reason Sokka has never been able to deduce that Hakoda is a fucked up drunk), Hakoda was angry to see that his son had finally managed to locate him. Luckily, a few hours later, Aang came back to pick up Sokka since some shit was going down in Ba Sing Se. Hakoda let out a sigh of relief and went back to partying. A day or so later though, not only did Sokka return, but so did his daughter, Katara. Hakoda proceeded to attempt suicide but unfortunately failed considering he was too drunk to kill himself properly.

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